Dear Nice Man, Your Girlfriend Sucks

Why is it that nice guys date such major bitches? Do nice men actually enjoy being treated like garbage? What the hell?

Case in point:

So, I busted my ass last night at the gym after a long day at work. By the time I got home, I was ravenously hungry, ready to chew my own arm off. I decided I'd head down to my local watering hole for a nice, juicy cheeseburger. Mmmm....cheeseburger.

Now, usually, this bar is fairly quiet on weeknights, so I'm guaranteed to get a seat. Not last night. Apparently, there were three, count them, THREE games on last night that mattered for Bostonians. I don't know crap about sports, so don't ask me which teams were playing. All I knew was there were no seats available and lots of beer guzzling going down.

I was determined to get my burger, so I scooted up to the bar and ordered my cheeseburger, well done, with no onions, salad with no dressing instead of fries, and a side of honey mustard. Mmmm......honey mustard. I know, very ridiculously specific annoying girly selection, but hey, I know the bartender so I can get away with it. The fact that I didn't have a seat didn't really bug me all that much. I just wanted the meat.

I chatted with a couple of very nice firefighters while waiting for my food to arrive, and once it did, I again squeezed myself up to the bar and proceeded to eat standing up. Now, in case you've forgotten, I'm pretty short. The bar, well, not so much. I probably looked like a crazy person trying to stand on my tippy-toes to chow down on a burger the size of my head. Oh well, right?

Well, there were a few people off to my left: a guy and his bitch, I'm sorry, girlfriend, and another female friend. He was sitting and they were standing. I caught bits of their conversation and decided if the girlfriend and I were put in a room alone together for an extended amount of time, I'd surely hurt her. She just would NOT shut up.

After finishing half of the burger and salad, the man realized I was struggling to eat my food standing up and kindly offered me his seat. "Thank you so much. That's so nice of you," I said, and gratefully sat down to enjoy the rest of my meal.

Chatty Kathy over there asks him why did he just do that. The bitch was pissed that her boyfriend, being the kind, considerate gentleman he is, offered a total stranger his chair. Why he didn't offer her the seat to begin with is a totally separate issue. Anyway, wouldn't you be impressed with your boyfriend if he did that? Wouldn't you think that was sweet of him? I did. All Chatty Kathy saw was another girl getting attention from her man. She was really unhappy about it.

I finished eating and returned his chair without following my instinct to tell him to dump her sorry ass. But seriously, he should dump her sorry ass. That girl is a bitch. Nice guy, thank you for the seat. You deserve better.